Thursday, September 13, 2007

Got a Bully? Get a Horse - At Risk Teens Find Help From Horses

By Catherine Held, PhD




A young woman learns how to stop her harasser through one session with a horse. Sound incredible? It's all in a day's work for one Equine Guided Educator in northern California. Since 2000, there has been a 300% increase in programs that bring humans and horses together for healing and learning purposes. Some of those programs specialize in working with teens.



Teens and Horses



Adolescent challenges include changing bodies, peer pressure, and the yearning for acceptance. The problems of at-risk teens are magnified. Innovative programing using horses is helping at-risk teens in new ways. One program in northern California, "Horse Sense for Teens At-Risk," helps youth in the Novato Youth Center teen pregnancy prevention program. The program uses horses to teach skills such as boundary setting, clear communication, and leadership skills. Horse Sense also serves homeless teens and adolescents with eating disorders.



Standing up to a Bully: It’s All About Congruence



A teen that came for a recent individual session had dropped out of school two months before. The young woman refused to return to school because she was being harassed and bullied. As the session began, the young woman talked to the equine educator about being intimidated by a fellow student, when suddenly the horse butted in.



Program horse "Toyota" walked over and began to knock his head into the girl’s shoulder, gently, yet insistently as the girl described her problems with the bully. The horse continued to “harass” the teen by pulling on her collar, pushing her around, and at one point even untying her shoelaces with his teeth. The young woman was clearly irritated with the horse's antics; her jaw tightened, her breath quickened, and her speech got tense.



The young woman appeased, then pleaded with Toyota, saying, “Please don’t do that,” while simultaneously petting him on the neck. As she continued her efforts to ‘make nice’ with the horse, the horse continued the harassment even more until finally, in complete exasperation, the teen held both hands out in front of her and yelled, “STOP IT!” Instantly Toyota complied, dropped his head and stood quietly by her side. Until that moment, the girl's actions were not in congruence with her intentions.



In just one session, under the educator's firm guidance, the willing horse had guided the young woman to access her own personal authority in a powerful form of experiential learning. Through the horse's antics, the teen saw that she was giving off mixed messages, which had worsened the situation. She learned how to stand her ground and mean it. Having practiced new skills, the young woman returned to school and successfully stood up to the bully who then stopped harassing her.



Learning How to Spot a Predator



Because horses are “prey” animals (they do not eat other animals, but instead are food for various predators), they are very attuned to their environment with what has been called socio-sensual awareness. For horses, predators are easy to spot because their intentions do not match their behaviors: they are incongruent. The horse has to recognize predators for survival and these are skills that our teens need to have as well.



Horses used in Equine Guided Education often "mirror" issues back to teens in ways that are easily remembered. In the example above, the girl was not congruent. She wanted the bullying to stop, but she also wanted to be in relationship, so she kept petting the horse, even as he was bothering her more and more. Her actions (the petting) did not match her desire (for the harassment to stop). Once she put some force behind her words, the horse backed off immediately, just as the bully did back at school.



Horse Sense for Teens: A Winning Combination



Taking Safe Risks.



Working with horses in equine guided education helps teens to take risks in a new environment under the guidance of trained adult leaders. Horses can be 1,000 lbs. or more, and the challenge of working with these magnificent animals can be daunting, but also feeds the adolescent desire to be challenged and "push the envelope."



Authentic Communication



One reason that so many adolescents tangle with the adults in their lives is that they are often brutally honest and can spot a "phony" easily. Teens and horses have little tolerance for adults that say one thing and do another. Like the horses, teens appreciate authentic communication, and people that "say it like it is." At the same time, teens need to learn to respect their elders, which the horses model.



Learning about Herd Behavior



Like the horses, adolescent survival in social settings is dependent upon getting along with the herd. Teens are often very savvy about picking up cues from their own "herd" or peer group. At the same time, they can fear rejection from their peers if they are honest about their feelings and life situations. The horses, with their large generous hearts, are very accepting and often will spontaneously go up to someone in need of the horse version of a hug.



Non-Verbal Cues



Teens respond especially well to working with the horses because so much of the learning happens non-verbally, and adolescents are often keen observers of the social cues around them. In addition, teens are often willing to face their fears and make positive changes. The non-verbal nature of the work is especially effective for English language learners.



Got a Bully? Get A Horse



Equine-guided education can be a powerful and effective answer to teaching teens important life skills. At-risk teens may be especially well-suited for experiential learning with horses because they like to take risks, want authentic communication, and because following the "herd" is so important to them. I urge you to support local equine programs that are helping teens navigate through the difficult passage of adolescence.




For more information on horses, healing, and psychology, I invite you to visit http://www.dreamhorsewomen.com



Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?Got-a-Bully?-Get-a-Horse---At-Risk-Teens-Find-Help-From-Horses&id=683037

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